“Unless you are at risk of physical harm, violence is not okay, acceptable, or justified.” ~Lisa Merlo-Booth
Seldom is a violent act all about one thing, but rather a conglomeration of many: uncontrolled anger, impulsiveness, fear, trauma, righteousness, cultural teachings, upbringing, and more. Similarly, the response to violence can take on many forms: silence, fear, anger, rage, aggression, justification, shame, self-blame, revenge, retaliation, etc. Violence leads to broken homes, marriages, friendships, and careers. And yet, far too many normalize, justify, and rationalize violent actions.
Do not normalize, rationalize, or justify aggression—your own or that of others.
Do whatever is necessary to learn healthy ways to manage conflict that does not involve yelling, shaming, slapping, punching, shooting, or harming others emotionally or physically. You are responsible for learning to safely manage upset and conflict in your home and your life. YOU are responsible for being safe in your home, job, and world. And if you are unable to manage your anger, then it is your job to get the help you need to do so. If someone you love is struggling to do the same or believes their aggression is normal, justified, deserved, or a part of who they are, then get the help you need to do what is necessary to ensure your safety (and your family’s).
Many have excused aggression for far too long. Aggression, intimidation, violence, and bullying have harmed many households, nations, and ultimately, our world. It’s time for all human beings to create a Radically New Culture™ that allows, inspires, and pulls for the thriving of all human beings within it.
Challenge: Regardless of how you were raised, what messages you bought into, or what you’ve been told, dare to challenge the long-standing dogma that might is right or power is aggressive. Commit to changing your power paradigm from the old power-over paradigm of aggression to the new paradigm of power-from-within. Learn to have your back without squashing the backs of those around you; hold others accountable to do the same.