These past two weeks have been a bit crazy. While I was in LA giving a workshop, my sister, who also happened to be in LA at the time, was in a car accident. She was hit by a drunk driver and sustained several injuries, including a broken nose and fractured cheekbones. Due to her injuries, flying was not an option, so we ended up going on a road trip from Los Angeles, California to Ft. Lauderdale, Florida. Needless to say it was a bit of a curve ball in both our plans.
Here are some of the things I learned—and am still learning — from this experience. I hope you find them helpful.
When life throws you a curveball:
1. Do the right thing—not the easiest thing. I know that if the tables were turned, I would be hoping to God that the people in my life would do whatever was necessary for me to be okay. The reality is that curve balls don’t come at the most opportune time. It’s our job to notice they’re there, get our priorities straight and do the right thing. The world will have to wait.
2. Know that some things will have to be dropped. Sometimes you have to forego some things or push them aside and you have to let go of the guilt that comes with that. Allow yourself the space to be where you truly need to be—you can catch up to the world later; they don’t need you now.
3. Give with a good spirit. If you are going to help someone, then truly help. Do not be resentful and act as though they owe you anything. They don’t. Remember that if the tables were turned, you would want the same.
4. Let go of the guilt. If you’re feeling guilty that the other person is hurt or sick or (fill in the blank) instead of you—let that go. It doesn’t serve you or them. There will be another time when you’re in the more difficult position. Be thankful that you can help in this moment on this day for this person.
5. Know that things happen for a reason. I’m a firm believer that things in life happen often with a guided hand. Trust that there’s a purpose in the experience even if it doesn’t seem clear right now. Often something good comes out of life’s tragedies. Be open enough to take the positives in; they usually help soften the blow.
6. Look for the humor. Laughter has a way of taking the sting away even in the most difficult of times. Don’t be afraid to laugh; sometimes it’s the best medicine.
7. Be thankful. When you take time away from your life to help another person in theirs, remember to thank the people who are making that possible for you. As you take care of someone else, you create a hole in your life that others have to fill—thank them for making it possible for you to be where you need to be.
On behalf of #7 above, I want to thank my husband and children for giving me the time and space I needed to be present for my sister. I’m thankful for my niece and other sister for helping with the cross-country drive—the laughs, stories, driving and company. I’m also thankful that my sister is alive and is healing and hope the healing is sooner, not later, and 100%. And finally, I thank all of my clients and blog readers for understanding my absence over the past two weeks. I’m glad to be back .
Challenge: If life throws you a curve ball, slow it down. Re-think your priorities, follow the lessons from above and do what you need to do. Trust that world can wait while you take care of what and whom you have to. Let go of the guilt, resentment, anger etc., and just relax into it. You may be surprised at the gifts you receive form the experience.