The best romantic partners in the world are not the ones with the most money, amazing sexual prowess or endless romantic creativity. Instead, they’re the ones who show you they have your back at all times — in big and small ways.
Having your (or your partner’s) back requires the following five essential elements:
1. Day to day showing of love with words AND actions. It’s all in the little things. A great partner effortlessly interweaves the little things into their relationship: the kind gesture, loving word, unwavering support, critical feedback said with love, affectionate touch and on and on. The day-to-day interactions of a great partner are…loving.
2. A bottom-line reverence and deep respect for your partner, even though you may disagree with something they say or do. A great partner doesn’t swear at, name call or yell at their partner. They don’t do this simply because they wouldn’t want to—not because their partner would be angry.
3. A genuine likeability factor—you genuinely like your partner and enjoy being in his/her company most of the time. When a person likes their partner, they’re proud to be with them in public, enjoy their little idiosyncrasies and treat them with a higher sense of respect. Couples who have the genuine likeability factor seem to naturally laugh, joke and play more with one another.
4. Openness to being spontaneous, trying new things, going to different places, etc., because you know your partner likes it and you love your partner. Being a great partner also requires that you know what your limit is and don’t say yes to something that goes past that limit. They’re flexible enough to be spontaneous and strong enough to say no.
5. Willing to listen and share the little things with a loving spirit and attentiveness. A great partner listens to what their partner wants to share, not just what they want to hear. They also share their stories and their day-to-day life without needing to be prodded, coaxed or pleaded with to share.
Being a great partner is necessary for creating a great relationship. It requires that you honor your partner in your words and actions on a daily basis. Although no one is perfect and life catches up with us at times, the great partner is easily able to regroup and get back on track should life sidetrack them for a while.
When you become a great partner to others, you will be better able to expect the same of those around you. You deserve to be in a great relationship that fuels you; becoming a great partner is a key step to getting that great relationship. The next step is to accept nothing less from your partner.
CHALLENGE: Look over the five essentials and pick one that you’re not doing well and work it. If you’re doing well in all of the above, make sure your partner is meeting you on their end. If they’re not, choose one area to hold them accountable for improving.